waves

3rd grade: Jane is my best friend. 

5th grade: Today I heard that Jane went over to Kelly's house last night. How could she? She knows that I hate Kelly. I'm so mad at her. We are fighting!

8th grade: Me, Emily, and Claire are BFFAEAEAE!!!

11th grade: I wish I had better friends.

Present: I went to coffee with Jane today. It was fun to hear about what she has been up to. I have missed her. Even though we haven't spoke in years, she still remembers me. She understands me. She always has. 


------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

We've all been a part of this story, in some way or another. We've been that friend that gets "dumped" by their best friend, we've been that friend that someone turns to seeking advice, we've been that friend that stops talking to someone just because they don't have the same train of thought as you. 

Friendship comes in waves. The tide comes in, stays for a while, & retreats back. No matter what anyone says, this is how friendship works. Want to argue with me on this one? Let's go. 

Think about your friends. Has there every been a time in your life where that friend has ALWAYS been there? No. Their own life gets in the way. But in times of desperate need, they are the first ones you call. They are the ones that come to you with a flotation device & drag you up from below the water (in a non-Titanic kind of way). Or if you have a friend like I do, they have the Happy Hour specials from every bar in Fargo-Moorhead on their phone, ready for your picking. 

It wasn't up until this past year that I "let go" of high school. I realized that just because I went to school with you, does not mean that I am forced to be friends with you. I should not have to impress, change, lie, or alter myself in any way just to have you call me your friend. & frankly, I don't want to. Hell to the no. It's my life & I get to pick who I want to call my friends. Lucky me.  

I'm at that point in my life where I need good, down to earth friends. I want friends that challenge my thinking, better me, call me & tell me something random, help me make decisions (decision making is not one of my best qualities), know what's wrong even if I don't say anything. 

Just last week I got a text asking me if everything was ok.

My response: No

Their response: I knew it Care!

I hadn't seen her in a week, yet she knew I wasn't all there. That's my best friend.

I challenge you to be the tide this week. Swoop in to a friends life that needs you. Even if they don't' need rescuing, I bet they have something to chat about. 

One last story.

Honestly, I don't remember having a conversation with Amber in high school. The more I read her blog & got to "know" her, it was clear that we are walking down the same path. We have some of the same struggles, decisions, changes, & joys. So, I asked her to go to coffee next week. We both agreed that our conversations would, to put it lady-like, kick ass.